Pet Peeves #1

So just the other day on my Whatsaap somebody typed "Thank you" and I responded with
 "Yw"( which is supposed to be the abbreviation for You're welcome)
I think I died a little inside that day. Esther, how could you??!

I'm still getting used to people typing "HBD, WULLNP" 😬 I mean! How lackadaisical can you be for gossakes? It just shows that you're not even trying.

In this era of smart phones and predictive texting, why will somebody text me "Gm. Hru. F9" (Good morning, how are you.Fine) and you expect Jesus to be happy with you.
The worst are those people who will omit one word from the sentence in the name of short hand e.g "Tank u" "Hw re u" 😳🌝🌚. Are the letters on your keypad quarreling?

My friend! Gerrarofhere for reals, you hear what I'm saying?
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End.Of.Rant

How To Get Away With Being A Feminist

Disclaimer: This post is steeped in conspiracy theories. Reader's discretion is advised.

Grey's Anatomy. How To Get Away With Murder. Scandal.
These three serials have one leading lady in common, Shonda Rhimes.

Shonda is a feminist through and through and she projects that passion into the female characters she casts in her serials. She has been very vocal about female empowerment. If you notice, most of the leading ladies on her shows portray single and very independent women who do not let their lives to be dictated or defined by any man, no matter how dreamy they are.

- Grey's Anatomy
It was mildly amusing on the internet the day Shonda killed off McDreamy's character. Fans of the show were so shocked/upset, they swore they'd stop watching the show. There's even a petition on the web to bring his character back. It's not that serious guys. LOL.
What was even more funny to me was the episode after his death, the show just moved on very quickly. Like they couldn't even be bothered to give Derek Shepherd a 'befitting burial'.
 It all made sense when I read that McDreamy was dropped from the show because he was having an affair with a married woman on set. Obviously Shonda wasn't having any of that nonsense. She capitalized on that opportunity to put Meredith front and centre of show.
Ladies, if your man can't keep it in his pants....drop him like a bad habit!.

If you notice most of the ladies on Grey's Anatomy don't have time for romance. They never let love or the idea of it override their good sense of judgement.

Meredith, Miranda & Torres all have children but are still very active surgeons. This is Shonda's way of telling us that you can have it both- kids & career. Which is a big contrast to African culture that suggests that a woman should sit down in the house and nurture the kids and cook meals because it is "her job"

Oh and then Cristina Yang ultimately channels Shonda's feminist nature when she tells Meredith: "You stay here. You are a gifted surgeon with an extraordinary mind. Don’t let what he wants eclipse what you need. He’s very dreamy, but he’s not the sun. You are"

Scandal
Olivia Pope has the President of the free world wrapped around her little finger. Need I say more?
Some of you may have thought it was rather harsh and hypocritical of Fitz, the way he sent Mellie packing from the White House. But that was Shonda's plan all along. You see Mellie is aiming to be a senator and President of the U.S. in the future and Shonda doesn't want it to look like It was Fitz who helped make Mellie senator and eventually president. So basically now Mellie gets there on her own merit. See what Shonda does? Essentially, as a woman, you can be whoever you want to be without help from any man.
You most certainly don't need a man on your arm to feel accomplished.
Hehe! Have I started sounding cray cray yet?

How To Get Away With Murder
I remember watching a scene with Annalise Keating and her mom where she was braiding her hair while she was grieving her husband. Her mom told her a story how she burnt down their family house with her husband inside it because he sexually abused Annalise as a child. All the while, Annalise thought her mom never knew.
Yet again, what was Shonda trying to tell us? You don't need to stay with a man that abuses you(emotionally, physically) or your kids! Run away from abusive relationships. Learn to stand up for yourself as a woman.

Oh and did I mention that Shonda has two adopted children and one via surrogacy?
In African culture that if you opt to have CS instead of vaginal delivery, they would shame you for being "weak or selfish" talk less of paying someone else to carry your baby for you. LOL. Your in laws will not let you hear the end of it. It's even funny in the labor room when women decline epidural, cos somehow you are perceived as "not being woman enough" You must   endure the pain as if it proves or validates your status as a woman.
Let's not even talk about the women who don't wish to have kids.

You gotta love Shonda because she challenges every stereotype about women or what roles society perceives they should play.

"Lead the life you want to lead. Be whoever you want to be. Have the babies. Be the CEO. Lean out. Lean in -- on your own terms. Just run this thing because I don't want the girls wishing they could be men for a day. I don't even want men wishing they could be women. I just want those words '[having] all of that,' I want all of that to apply to all of us." - Shonda Rhimes

Learning Daily (featuring guest writer, Tobi Alabi)

As comfortable as that web of perfection may be, you don't want to be stuck sitting pretty. If you're a perfectionist like me, I'm sure you've had many business meetings with procrastination and even signed several contracts with him. You found out long before now that he's a terrible business partner that ends up duping you every time you engage with him, yet you can't seem to break that relationship.
I know, I've been there severally and what I've realized is that the perfectionist has the "start when it's all right" syndrome. You want everything to be right before you make that move because of course you can't stand mediocrity and want everything you do to be top-notch. Certainly nothing wrong with that, but the problem is when you decide to stay stuck. When you're stuck in that web of "everything has to be perfect first", you refuse to move and when you refuse to move you end up doing nothing and becoming nothing.

I have learnt that before you start, you'll never have all the money you need, all the resources, all the right people. But they will be made available once you move that gear from park to accelerate.
Life is a 24/7 hour school with no break periods. You'll always learn something new, get a new idea, a new strategy to tackle things. So don't wait till you have it all together, you never will. There will never be a time you know it all or a time you exceed your learning capacity, until of course you shut your eyes to final rest. I have also learnt that successful people are not necessarily the ones with all the knowledge in the world, but they are the ones who put what they learn to practical use.
Ever heard the saying, "little by little a little becomes a lot"?. Well it only becomes a lot when you decide to start putting in the little. A cup put under a tap will eventually get full with time even though the water comes out in drops.
"Good" becomes "better" before it becomes "best". The time is now, START and be willing to grow through it.

Baby Steps

Disclaimer: This is not a self righteous post.
OMG I'm becoming one of them!
I remember there was a time I used to silently judge some of my friends on Facebook who always posted "religious themed" status updates. Na only you waka come? Wow. Look at me now.

I remember there was a time I was so obsessed with rap music, Lil Wayne to be precise. I could sing all his (rather explicit) songs from A - Z.
If you know me well enough you'd know I love music and I learn songs very easily. I knew the lyrics to every song that frequently played on the radio.
Then my mum will ask me "Young lady, are you sure you are a Christian? How is it that the same mouth you used to sing gospel songs, you would still use to sing worldly music?" I would just laugh and continue listening to my portable radio in the kitchen.
I remember how my mum would come into my room in the morning and quarrel with me because I left my radio on to play all night filling my spirit with worldly music, as she put it. My own argument then was "But I'm asleep, how could that possibly happen?"
You see these days, I am quite shocked at myself cos when someone asks me "Oh you don't know Wizkid's or Drake's latest song?" And I'm just looking at them with a very puzzled expression.
There is no way you would have told the Esther of 2007 that the only songs she would have interest in listening to in 2015 are gospel themed songs.
This one might make no sense to you, but I used to be a Coca Cola addict. I could not go a week without drinking at least 1 liter of Cola. It still surprises me that now I can look at a bottle of Coke and not have the urge to drink it. Today I'm 2months sober. Baby steps.
Moral of this plenty grammar?
Sometimes I feel like my life is going nowhere and it tends to make me depressed and frustrated. Intermittently I lash out at God or simply just run/hide. You know what the beautiful thing is? He always seeks me out to restore me, patiently waiting to resume our relationship.
Then I began to see the "little things" and appreciate them. He made me realize that there is a process I have to go through before I get THERE and I have to trust him no matter how long the process is going to be. Whoa!
I'm not there yet but I know God is working tirelessly on me to attain perfection in Christ. Lord knows it's a daily struggle and I've faltered and at times lost my way but he hasn't given up on me. For this I am eternally grateful.
I thank God for my praying mother. I am thankful for growth no matter how small.
The ultimate goal is that one day He will look down on me and say; "This is my beloved daughter in whom I am well pleased"