Netflix and Chill

"If a girl is alone with a guy in his room and he starts touching her intimately and she tells him to stop, and he stops, is the guy a  mumu (stupid)?"

That was the question a male colleague asked during a class discussion which he expected all the females to answer.

I recall being in a foul mood that day and on hearing the question I thought to myself "What in the hell kinda stupid question is that?! Surely he can't be serious? If not anything, that guy is a perfect gentleman"

Be that as it may, it was a legitimate/valid question, and it stirs troubling thoughts. Let me explain. Recently a slang has been making popular rounds on the Internet: "Netflix and Chill". Apparently it's supposed to be some sort of code for "come over to my house lets have sex, under the pretext of watching a movie" Sound familiar?

It's a play that guys have been using to prey on unsuspecting females for a long time, they just found a more fancy name for it. 

A guy invites a girl to his house to watch a movie and maybe gist with him or cook for him as the case may be. As per "let's hangout"  Alright so excited and eager to please female comes to his house with the intention of doing just and only that. Next thing you know he's touching her in places she is not comfortable with(behind close doors of cos because as we all know, that's only how cowards operate) Confused, scared or annoyed female tries to resist his advances and he gets defensive saying "Afterall is it not what you came here for" *insert flabbergasted emoji* 

Worse case scenario, he drugs her drink and has his way with her.

There seems to be some sort of unwritten code that if a girl comes to a guy's house unaccompanied, she is literally asking, in short, begging the guy to sleep with her, whether she actually says so or not. Says who? Were you raised by wild animals or what?

Young man, if she says stop touching me, I don't like it. Stop! 

Even if she is wearing the lowest cleavage and the tightest skirt, No actually means No! It is not a code word for "Please continue"

Anything after that is Rape. Don't allow the devil to use you.

It's all well and good to teach our females to carry themselves a certain way so that they can "find a good husband". But who is teaching our men to do the same?

The Criteria For Death

My eyes hurt.

Driving in Nigeria, especially in Lagos, can be such a kill joy. It's a mixture of questionably sane drivers, bad roads and hellish traffic.

But if there is one thing Nigerian drivers fear on the road, it is driving besides or at the back of a trailer/tanker. I have a friend who literally freaks out if she's in a car that's too close to a trailer. Same with my mom, she stays as far away as possible from those things when she is driving. Safety reasons primarily.

So you can imagine my distress this morning when I read in the papers that a trailer fell off Ojuelegba bridge yesterday, crushing two cars and killing three people(an entire family)

First thing that came to my mind was "What the heck is a trailer doing driving on top of a bridge?" Never mind the fact that those innocent souls were nowhere near the trailer but somehow disaster managed to meet them still. Damn.

Which brings me to the peak of my frustration. Nigerians are too quick to say "Buhari this, Buhari that" yet we fail to realize that the problem of Nigeria is Nigerians. Obviously somebody should have been responsible for making sure that the container was latched properly to the trailer before putting it on the road. The driver shouldn't have been on that bridge in a very busy area for that matter. It took about 4hrs for the bodies to be recovered from under the trailer, speaks volumes of our piss poor emergency response system.

Please tell me is it Buhari that will come and supply us with common sense and a sense of responsibility? Aargh!

I don't know what the criteria for death is. But my prayer is that in these remaining few months of the year, we and our loved ones will never meet that criteria.

                 <<end of rant>>