We Can't All Be Feminists

"We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller.
We say to girls: You can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful but not too successful, otherwise you will threaten the man. If you are the breadwinner in your relationship with a man, pretend that you are not, especially in public, otherwise you will emasculate him."  -Chimamanda Adichie

Do men (yes I am generalizing) feel threatened by successful/powerful women?

These 21st century men claim that they like a girl who is smart, intellectual and can hold an intelligent conversation because according to them they don't want to marry a liability.

But ask him if he would be comfortable if his wife ends up making more money than he does or is career driven?
Till this day I've not gotten the response "It doesn't matter"

I've heard all the excuses men have to give about why it is not "acceptable" for a woman to earn more money than her man, but perhaps the most ludicrous of them all is that, successful women are proud and feel entitled.
And with good reason I dare say!

"A really strong man wants a woman who is equal to him, that is the truth of it now. A weak man wants someone that is docile and a servant to him — it is a real sign of insecurity in a man to want a brainless trophy wife. Wives can be beautiful, intelligent and have careers and opinions just as strong as their partners." - Dr. Juan

So men, I ask you again, what is it that you guys really want, a doormat, baby making factory, trophy wife or a successful woman?

Don't poop where you eat

Disclaimer: I'm extremely bored, amongst other things,  Read @ your own risk.

If you graduated from a federal university in Nigeria, you are already a champion in your own right.
If you graduated from a federal university in Nigeria and you stayed in school hostel, my dear you are a living legend.

I remember my first day of Uni, my mom dropped me off at Female Hostel Hall 9 at the University of Calabar. She was so proud that I was going to be a Malabress as she too had once been. The hostel was in disarray as most of the students hadn't returned from the break so I had to "squat" with someone who later turned out to be a very good friend/school mother down the road ☺️😍

I digress.  *proceed with caution*

The toilets/bathrooms in Hall 9 are 😷😷💩😩 disgusting! I'm having PTSD just thinking about them.
Ok I think the toilets were way worse than the bathrooms, because nobody actually used the toilets. Yes o! Not unless you wanted a million evil spirits to park inside you while you were doing your business in the White House. Believe you me, there was nothing remotely white about that house.

So as part of my unofficial orientation, I was told/advised to buy a plastic bucket with a cover, so anytime nature called, I'd answer the call in my room(or on the corridor as I saw some girls do), and then stroll majestically to the "toilet area", stand at the door(you must never step foot inside) and fling the contents of your bucket as far as they can go into the pitch darkness, turn around and leave. I always felt sorry for the cleaners that worked there.

The phrase "don't shit where you eat" obviously didn't apply to us.
I got over the shock very quickly, my parents had expressly warned  me not to call home (Backstory: in JSS3, I stayed in boarding house for one week and called my parents begging them to come take me back. Those seniors eh!)

At night I'd come out to get dinner and the front of the hostel will be lined with "posh" cars, men who had come to see their lady friends. I will just laugh inside me and think "if only he knew where she did.....oh never mind! I shall proceed to see myself out! Bye now!

Everyday is for the thief

It's been a long time coming and I've all but physically restrained myself from ranting on this issue but that ship has sailed.
Can we please talk about plagiarism as it pertains to Nigerians?


Just yesterday, I was searching for a news story online in order to verify its authenticity and I discovered that all of the blogs I visited that carried the story said the same thing word for word. It was just about one or two blogs that bothered to quote the source of their story, which was I this case Tribune newspaper.
In short eh, these Nigerian bloggers have no fear of God in them. They would plagiarize any and every thing if it would mean their blog gets more hits. Remember the Linda Ikeji saga. 


Then we have the "copy and paste" people on Facebook. These ones their stock in trade is to kidnap other people's status messages and pass them off as their own, without even bothering to acknowledge the source. It is mildly amusing when I see a status message on somebody's wall (that I know they didn't author) and then people will comment under it with things like "You are really a lovely writer" and the person will have the effrontery  to reply "Thank you *insert smiley or kiss emoticon*"
Na wa.


The one that simply astounds me are lecture slides. One lecturer  can just decide to sit down and regurgitate Wikipedia or Medscape as a PowerPoint presentation without even bothering to quote references.
P.S hope y'all know that Wikipedia information cannot be 100% relied upon. I mean basically anybody can stroll into a Wiki page and edit something. I know I have.




Back to the matter. 
"Plagiarism is the "wrongful appropriation" and "stealing and publication" of another author's "language, thoughts, ideas, or expressions" and the representation of them as one's own original work. It is an act of fraud"


To whom the cap fits, let him wear it. Consider yourself warned.